Adele: A night I’ll never forget

Adele eyes

On Saturday night my lovely girlfriend and I took our seats at ANZ stadium amongst 95,000 other Adele fans. Well, maybe 80,000 fans and 15,000 boyfriends/husbands dragged along for the ride. Just after the sun set, the stadium lights went down, the stage in the centre of the stadium the focal point in the darkness. The gigantic screens surrounding the circular stage displayed an image of Adele’s closed eyes. At 8pm, the eyes opened and the screens lifted into the air. With no formal introduction, no chatter with the crowd, the woman who brought Sydney to a standstill greeted us Hello. Continue reading

Apologies in advance.

chemo-made-me-do-it

Last night I was watching Quantum of Solace, a movie I have watched at least five or six times, and there were parts of the movie I have absolutely no recollection of. I am usually able to recall movies so easily. For god’s sake, I’ve managed to memorise most of the Hamilton soundtrack in less than two weeks. But thanks to last year’s chemo, some stuff seems to have disappeared if not for good, at least for now. Continue reading

Fucking Chemo

cytotoxic

Generally, I try not to swear when I write. I swear enough when I talk. But I really fucking hate chemo. It’s obvious, I know. No one likes chemo. Well I hope no one likes chemo. I have spent the two and a half months since coming home bouncing between ‘chemo is a necessary evil’ and ‘nope, I don’t wanna’. I’m lucky that I have a family who are willing to support me regardless of which option I take, now and in the future. Continue reading

And so big school begins

little-dude-school

“We saw a police car rescuing someone for driving too fast. He fell on the ground because he wanted to get away from the policeman. They pushed him on the floor. He wasn’t dead though. He was just laying on the floor. There wasn’t blood though.”
-Little Dude, big school, day 4.

This is what the little dude told us happened on an excursion today. It’s precisely why I am excited that he has started school, to listen to him retell the days event without us putting things in context for him. And it’s been rippers like this all week! Continue reading

Living with an ileostomy bag

poop

*If the title didn’t give it away, be warned – herein lies more poop talk.

I imagine that for people whose lives don’t revolve around poop, that the repeated talk of poop by those of us whose life does revolve around poop can seem kind of unnecessary. But some life experiences not only change your perspective on poop but also make it one of the most consuming aspects of your life. Continue reading

Life via Social Media

social-media-icons

Social media. As much as I use it, I’ve never been a big fan of it. I had a MySpace back in the day but I held out on Facebook because I just didn’t see it as a necessity. As a big talker I always preferred a good old chat on the phone. Then all my friends went overseas and it was the only way to see their far flung adventures so I caved. Now, I’m as much a slave to it as anyone else. Continue reading

Give me strength.

strength

Throughout this appendix cancer caper, people keep telling me I’m amazing and I’m strong and I’m doing so well. I’ve never been good at compliments and to be honest, it makes me feel like a fraud. Although I am doing very well in my recovery, overall I just get out of bed each day. Sure I do it with a sense of humour and a smile but it doesn’t mean it’s not hard and doesn’t catch me out. People tell me of others who might let a cancer diagnosis beat them – who would be negative and struggle to face things. It makes me wonder, are there people like that and is that so bad? When you are hit by a truck there’s no shame in going down. There is no shame in staying down for a good long while. Here’s the truth about my perceived strength. Continue reading

What is normal anyway?

normal

Home sweet home. After four weeks in hospital it was an overwhelming relief to walk through the doors to our home. The familiar mess in the lounge room, our messy bed, children’s books strewn across the floor and one very pathetic feline! The problem with being home though is that often people assume that everything is back to normal. I know that we’ll settle into a new ‘normal’ but our life is so far from what we know as normal. A psychologist described it as a ‘complex and challenging situation’. She’s not wrong. Continue reading